Tag Archives: Ashley Oerman

Social Media Makeovers: What’s YOUR Online Image?

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Here is my second post from “Becoming Fearless” at the Huffington Post! Hope you can take something positive from my experience…

Most young adults looking for jobs or just trying to keep a decent reputation are scared of social media biting them in the ass. They change their Facebook names to their nicknames, stop accepting friend requests from people they’ve never met, lock down their privacy settings, and of course un-tag photos from last week’s keg race.

I rarely hear from people who have knowingly lost a job or opportunity because of a status update, tweet, or profile picture. But take it from someone who learned the hard way: The fear of social media coming back to bite you should not be taken with a grain of salt. In fact, if you don’t react to this fear, you might get kicked out of Germany. Well, at least that’s what happened to me….

During my junior year of college, a friend of mine told me about an organization that sends students to military bases all over the world to help with summer camps for military children. Let’s call it Camp Shmadventure.

This seemed like my perfect opportunity to cheaply travel all over Europe, since my living and flight expenses would be covered and I would even receive a stipend for working on the base. Unfortunately, the cash came with a hefty load of rules, which included no more than one alcoholic beverage per hour, no shots, no drinking if you were under 21, and a curfew. Although these rules seemed a little strict, what I heard from the program’s veterans sounded like there was something of a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy when it came to breaking the rules in the name of fun. Lucky for me, I was turning 21 my first weekend in Germany and planned to celebrate it just as I would in the U.S. And I did.

A couple weeks later, I uploaded pictures from my German birthday bash onto Facebook. They included a picture of me holding an empty shot glass while standing next to a friend, another of me gripping a beer mug, and a photo of me asleep with a laptop on my stomach (I was mid-Skype session). I assumed all of my 800-plus “friends” on Facebook had my best interests in mind and would be thrilled to see that I’d celebrated my 21st to the full extent. What I didn’t know was that one of those 800 “friends” worked for Camp Shmadventure. Oops.

To sum up the aftermath, four days later I was on a plane headed back to the U.S. with my friend and fellow camp counselor (the one in the shot picture) by my side. Just three weeks into my three-month trip I had successfully used social media to screw up my (and my friend’s) entire summer.

While it sucks that I missed out on the trip of a lifetime, I think I may have saved myself from worse consequences in the future. Due to this lesson in social media discretion, I deleted over half of my “friends,” limited my privacy settings, and cleaned up my online image. I’d like to think that my social media makeover will keep my future boss(es) from thinking less of me — especially since employers aren’t afraid of digging into your social media pages to find out more about you (according to my friend who worked for a recruiting company).

Although it feels wrong to write about something you should be afraid of on a page that’s dedicated to overcoming fear, I think having anxiety about your online image is a good thing. Hopefully, it encourages you to put your best self forward when posting a status update, tweeting, and of course uploading pictures.

–Ashley Oerman

Study: Less White Lies Leads to Healthier You

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Everyone has that friend who never fails to give you a straight-up answer. Whether you’re asking about your outfit or your eyebrows, she’s the only one to tell you to tweek both. Though her honesty makes you want to punch her in the boob, she may be healthier because of it, according to a study by the American Psychological Association.

The “Science of Honesty” study found that Americans (who often lie an average of 11 times per week) had improved physical and mental health after getting honest. Scientists asked half of the 110 people studied to stop lying for 10 weeks and observed their overall physical and mental well-being.

The “no-lie” group had a decrease in complaints about feeling stressed or bored. At the same time, the truth-tellers reported less physical ailments such as headaches and sore throats.What’s another benefit of telling it like it is? Surprisingly, non-liars saw improvements in close personal relationships.

Bottom line: Telling fewer lies may save you headaches and stress but don’t blame me if you get backhanded for telling your friend she looks like crap.

–Ashley Oerman

Produce, Even the Good Stuff Has a Dark Side

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Like anyone trying to lose weight, I thought fruits and vegetables were fair game to binge on. I was wrong. Loyola University Health System told Science Daily that you can O.D. on produce just like potato chips.

So what’s a girl to do? Registered dietitian Brooke Schantz said the best way to combat the bulge is by remembering that overall weight loss depends on calories in vs. calories out, not just what kind of foods your eating.

However, don’t ditch the produce aisle just yet. Non-starchy vegetables such as cucumbers, celery, and broccoli are perfect for snacking because they contain tons of h2o and fiber to keep you full. Check out this list of veggies (by the Mayo clinic) that will keep you satisfied without tipping the scale.

Bottom Line: Fruits and vegetables pack loads of nutrients that your body needs but just like any other food you should chow in moderation.

–Ashley Oerman

Are You a Sleepwalker? Study: Sleepwalking is common

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Where were you last night?

I have this friend, let’s call her “Erika,” who had a sleepwalking problem a couple of years ago. Sometimes, after coming home from a night out, Erika would leave her bed, find a more suitable room, put on the occupant’s pajama bottoms, crawl into their bed, and pass out.

According to a study published in the medical journal  Neurology, Erika is among the 3.6 percent (or over 8.4 million) of American adults who end up in unexpected places in the middle of the night.

So what causes millions of people to act like this mid-slumber? It starts with “arousal from non-REM sleep”–which is the stage when your body repairs many of it’s tissues and occurs right before you fall into a much deeper or rapid eye movement sleep. The study says a number of medical issues like alcohol abuse, depression, and OCD could trigger the disorder but there are no known causes.

More fun facts about sleepwalking:

  • A majority of sleepwalkers surveyed said they had been sleepwalking for the past five years.
  • Sleeping pills increase your risk of sleepwalking.
  • About one-third of sleepwalkers have a family history.

–Ashley Oerman

In The News: Do You Have FOMO?

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  1. Do you avoid checking your Facebook news feed on Monday because you skipped out on Friday’s girl’s night?
  2. Does seeing a friend’s Tweet without your name tagged make you cry?
  3. Do you feel the need to create an exciting status when you’re doing something by yourself, even if it’s boring?

If you answered yes to any of the previous questions, you may have FOMO or a fear of missing out. According to in article in the June issue of Women’s Health,  the unofficial disorder is driving women everywhere crazy!

The article says about 70 percent of adults are FOMO-ridden, which makes them concentrate more on the experiences they’re not  having rather than the ones they are (which seem extremely lame compared with your college bestie’s latest FB album).

So how do FOMOs deal with this debilitating disorder?  According to the article they take the following course of action. Step one involves feeling “uncertain, regret, or envy” (this probably hits immediately after seeing a status update that includes a really fun event and excludes you). The second step involves thoughts such as, “Ha. A “Christmas in July” themed bar crawl? Psh. I’m having way more fun reading “Hunger Games.”

Next is the status update on your social media of choice. “Team Gale For Life #BestBookEver #HavingABlast #ILoveMyLife.” According to psychologist Sherry Turkle, Ph.D., people with FOMO have a hard time living up to the “images projected by others” as well as “the images they presented themselves.”

Luckily, there’s an upside to this disorder. It gets you excited to do something great with your life!

Helpful Hint: If you’re feeling low from a bad case of FOMO, try to remember you’re only seeing the best part of someone’s life via social media, one expert in the article suggests.

Also (as someone who had a nasty time with FOMO this time last year) try looking through your own FB albums and updates. Your life looks pretty great onscreen too!

–Ashley Oerman

Newest Weight Loss Tool: Diet Goggles

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Since graduating about a month ago, I’ve had to shed my “college student” status. Now, I’m trying to lose the 5 to 8 lbs that came with the title. Luckily, with technology’s great advancements it shouldn’t be too hard.

Exhibit A, Japan’s “diet glasses.” Basically, these bad boys enlarge the image of what you’re eating and leave your hands the same size. According to the University of Tokyo, people who used the goggles ate 10 percent less when the food they were eating was magnified by 50 percent.

Exhibit B, Smell-o-vision. The same company is developing another type of wearable device that tricks people into thinking the food they’re eating is tastier than it is. An article by AFP says users can change the settings on the device to make their food taste like a strawberry or chocolate cookie.

–Ashley Oerman

Fitness Magazine Warns: Multi-Tasking Meltdowns

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While checking out Fitness’s May issue, I came across an article that made me step away from the computer and throw away my half-eaten lunch. In her article, “Prescription for Danger,” Jeannette Moringer reviews seven deadly sins of multi-tasking, which includes eating lunch in front of a germy computer.

Though most of these time-saving mistakes aren’t actually deadly, they could end up costing you more time than you tried to save in the first place. Here are a few of the worst time savers.

Pharmacy Drive-Throughs. Waiting  in line might save you more time than you think, Monringer writes. This is because you’re missing out on the interaction with a pharmacist who has valuable info on “side effects, generic options, and what to do if you miss a dose.”  This doesn’t seem like a big deal but if you have the time it’s probably best to step out of the car and into the line. According to the article, there are about six errors in every 10,000 prescriptions sold.  YIKES!

Hitting The Showers Too Quickly. This sounds weird but skipping the cool down/ stretching portion of your workout to shower up before speeding off to your next endeavor is bad news. When you don’t give your pulse time to taper off, “blood pools in your large (her words not mine) leg muscles, which can make you feel light-headed,” says Kara Mohr Ph.D in the article. There’s Nothing like passing out in the shower to make you slow down.

Eating In Front Of Your Computer. Not only is your desk full of germs (maybe 400 times more than a toilet!) but eating in front of a screen makes you feel “less satisfied” after finishing up. So not only are you eating germs, you’re wanting to do it more often because you’re still hungry. Yum.

Now here’s something you can do with all that time you save by keeping yourself healthy! What are some things you do to save time?

–Ashley Oerman

What Were You Thinking? Study: Blame Your Hormones

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Keeper or baby daddy? Let your hormones decide.

Have you ever dated a bad boy and later wondered, “What the hell was I thinking?” You’re not alone. A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found this phenomenon (like mood swings, periods, and facial hair) can be blamed on hormones.

According to the study, ovulating women are more likely to associate bad boys–i.e. rebellious, sexy, good-looking–with great parenting.  While women are most fertile, they’re more likely to go after a babe in hopes of passing down those great genes to their future children. This instinct overrides their ability to filter the keepers from the George Clooneys.

So how can you prevent yourself from getting stuck with a bad boy?

1. Keep track of your ovulation. Know when your hormones are getting the best of you. Hint: Guys like Charlie Sheen, George Clooney, and Johnny Depp may seem more attractive than usual.

2. Take some time before you jump into a relationship head first. It might help to wait a week or two to decide if this guy is worth pursuing. By then, you’re crazy hormones should have worn off.

3. If you decide the bad boy is a keeper, read this.  

–Ashley Oerman

The Secret To Getting Straight Answers

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Ever wanted a straight forward answer from a shady guy or sketchy friend? Well, surprisingly, what you ask them might not be as important as the way you ask them. A study by the American Association for Public Opinion Research found that people are more likely to be honest and to the point when answering questions via text message.

So, how can you use this to your advantage? Try texting instead of talking in these sticky situations.

1. Your boy that’s a friend (with bonus activity) makes it clear that he does NOT want to be your boyfriend and you want to know why. BUT make sure you really want to know.

2. You’ve been feeling some tension between you and one of your besties lately and have no clue what’s up. BUT you should probably talk in person at some point.

3. One of your co-workers has been a HUGE biotch and you want to know what her problem is. BUT try to smooth things over, it’s never good to add more stress to your work day.

When do you think talking is better than texting? Let me know! In the meantime, here is some advice on decoding dude’s texts.

-Ashley Oerman

Men’s Health: Why Women Cheat and How To Prevent it

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I recently went on a magazine-buying-binge ($ 30 worth) and decided to pick up an issue of Men’s Health. I guess I’ve always wondered what goes on between those pages. Boys don’t need makeup tips or care about the latest shoe trends. So what else could they possibly want to know? I was surprised to find it’s a lot like what ladies look for: Relationship advice, body news, and pictures of Zac Efron .

May’s issue of Men’s Health—which features the former Disney hottie—contains an article that delves into why women cheat. A subject many women may not know much about. The article called, “Why She’ll Cheat on You,” by Laura Roberson spills on what drives you (assuming you’re a lady) to cheat on your significant other. These include a lack of excitement, team work, interest (from him), affirmation, and cheerleading (also from him).

After each blurb about why these relationship qualities are important, Roberson gives a little advice (from love experts) so dudes can fix the problem before you skip off to Cheatsville U.S.A.

So what can you take away from this? Here’s some professional advice on how to direct your man, if your relationship is starting to feel faded, so you can live happily ever after.

1.  Tell him you want to designate some time to talk to each other.  According to the article, it’s important for him to actually listen to what you’re saying. Here’s some advice on how to make (or sneakily persuade) him to listen to you.

2. Ask him to work on a project with you. Roberson writes that women need to feel like their man is helping them grow, which helps bond the two of you for the long haul. Roberson suggests doing something constructive together like renovating a space or planning a trip. Although I’m no expert, I suggest hitting the gym together. Improving your bods is a great way to connect and work together.

3. Ask him for fashion advice. Okay, so maybe he can’t decipher a peep toe from a stiletto but asking your man for advice on what to wear might help encourage him to compliment your best assets. Roberson writes that receiving compliments specific to your look—i.e. your boobs look huge in that shirt vs. you look nice—makes you feel more secure with yourself and possibly your relationship. So the next time you’re endlessly debating what jeans to wear, try a pair or two on for him and ask his advice. You’ll both be glad you did.

 Bottom line: Cheating is bad. But according to Men’s Health there’s a reason why ladies are led to it. If he’s not meeting your needs and you’re considering an outside relationship, do yourself (and him) a favor and break it off. You deserve the best not just a man on the side.

P.S. Check out this article to see if you can tell if your man has gone astray.

-Ashley Oerman